I will not survive the next couple months unless I am disciplined in studying scripture, and being connected to God. My shelf-life is very short, and I will burn out of ministry, school, and work unless God is my focus in all that I do.

I have school two nights a week.
I have small group two nights a week
and I'll be working three nights a week.
In addition to that I have an internship during week which takes up a couple days during the week, and I'm pursuing getting a second job at a restaurant during lunch shifts. Outside of being Connected with God I will fail.

My Goal is to pay off my trip to Israel, and start saving for when I get married/move out on my own.

- Jeff

The Reach Beyond on Friday was awesome and it taught me something. I for the very first time was shown how utterly inadequate I am to accomplish the purposes of God. Like I had known it for the longest time, but it was all up in my face on Friday. God brought everything together, and there is no way that the Reach Beyond could have turned out the way that it did if it wasn't for God Grace.

I just got off work and a bunch of the people who I work with were going to a party with strippers. It breaks my heart when I see such smart people believing the cultural lies of today. I pray the beer they drink will not satisfy them. I pray that if any of them have sex tonight that it won't satisfy them. I want them to be discontent with everything that they worship.

Man, again I realize the power I possess to just totally destroy another human being emotionally. Like a couple of months ago I made someone who is a very godly individual cry because of a joke I made that apparently wasn't very funny at all. Like I had no intention of hurting that individual at all, but apparently I came off as a total jerk to everyone involved in the situation, which was really eating me alive for awhile but I've come to grips with whats happened in the situation, repented, and I pray that the other parties involved will have the maturity to forgive me(I did attempt to biblically reconcile myself to that individual but I'm not sure if that was received very well by them).

But I found out today that I really hurt this other person in November who liked me, because I'm reckless and stupid and a fool and a total Noob. And like I think this girl is freaking an awesome person and love her to death as a sister in Christ, but dang I hurt this person and she was bummed for like a week.

So I'm just awed at the power my words/actions have on other people. It's pretty freaking scary to say the least. So I'm trying to watch what I say and use tact always in my actions as well as my words.

Well this post is the result of not wanting to exegete 2 Corinthians 1:12-24... now back to doing homework.

Some one at Church today asked me if I was burning out as an intern. Like not to be arrogant or hurtful but like to honestly know how I was handling all the things in my life. I don't remember who exactly it was because I've been very busy these past couple of days and talked to many people, so people and conversations get all jumbled in my mind at times.

But I'm not burning out, like I've burned out before as a intern and now I'm doing way more then I was doing the first time.... but I don't feel like I'm burning out at all. Integrity is something that God has placed one my heart these past couple months. Letting my words simply be Yes or No, and following through with the commitments I've made. God's really strengthened me in these times. The church plant is very demanding and we wouldn't get anything accomplished if it wasn't for the power of God. So I believe that God's orchestrated the past couple of months in my life to mold me into the person I need to be to last.

Praise God cause I'm a freaking weak person, and he keeps me from disqualifying myself from Ministry.

- Jeff